Yep. Seven pounds. I have gained SEVEN pounds since this flare up started exactly 5 weeks ago. I have been knocked down on my ass due to severe, chronic foot pain. It has been a long road and a hard road. And because it’s my feet, I haven’t exactly been doing a lot of walking. There for a bit, I couldn’t even hardly get from one end of the house to the other.
My husband would make me a sandwich for lunch and put it in the refrigerator….but I still had to actually GET to the refrigerator to get the sandwich. Some days I made it to the refrigerator, and some days I did not. Therefore, I requested some snacks that I would like to have on hand, something I could just unwrap and eat, something that did not have to be refrigerated so I could just place a box of these snacks at various places in the house where I might find myself planted throughout the day.
My choice for snacks were Quaker Chewy Chocolate Chip Granola bars…and Nature Valley Granola Thins (with a thin dark chocolate layer). These damn things are good. Way good. I mean, “you can’t eat just one” good.
Being a diabetic, I rationalized. Just one of these things aren’t that bad as far as sugar goes. The Quaker bars have only 7 sugars, 17 carbs. Not terrible. Not bad at all, really….I thought to myself. And the Nature Valley bars only have 6 grams of sugar. Even better! Hey these things won’t be that bad for me, I mean look how low those sugar grams are!! I can have these! So I instructed my husband to bring home a couple boxes of each from the grocery store. The Value Pack size. Eighteen in a box. So I wouldn’t run out during the week. Yeah….get the Value Size.
So anyway….hubby gets the Value size of each kind of granola bars. And there I am, all day long, stuck on the couch for hours. Lunchtime rolls around and my feet are screaming. I look at my shoes, look at my sandals, all lined up under the coffee table. Which pair shall I put on to get me to the refrigerator for my sandwich? Which pair will cause the least amount of agony? I put on my compression stockings for the support and then slide into my sandals.
Okay….ready to try to get to the refrigerator now. Or…..I could just eat one or two of the granola bars. That could tide me over until my pain eases up a little bit more. Okay, let’s do that. So I open the box of the Quaker bars. I tear the wrapper open and take a bite. Oh shit these are so good. Wow. But as I’m eating, I realize….these suckers are so….small! I mean how do they expect you to feel satisfied by just eating one of these little things?? Are you serious? I finished that bar in like 30 seconds, max! I gotta eat one more. One just isn’t gonna cut it, no freaking way. I am HUNGRY. This is kinda gonna be my lunch so even though I’ll be consuming 14 grams of sugar and 34 carbs….I’ll just call this lunch. Okay, this is lunch. I open another wrapper and devour the thing in 20 seconds. God these are the best damn granola bars EVER MADE. Wow.
So then I take off my sandals and my compression stockings and swing my legs back up on the couch and reach for my laptop. Gonna do a little surfing now. Maybe I’ll check out Facebook. Say hi to some friends, check the birthday list and wish some people a happy birthday. My eyes casually wander over to the box of Quaker Chewy Chocolate Chip granola bars under the coffee table. I glance away. NO. I will not have another granola bar. ForGET it. No way. You realize if you eat another one you will have consumed 21 grams of sugar??? Are you freaking nuts??? And that would be FIFTY ONE CARBS. Holy Shit!!!! You cannot have another granola bar!!! You. Cannot. Have. Another. Granola. Bar.
I slowly put my laptop on the coffee table and look at the box. The memory of the sweet goodness of the granola bars loom in my brain like a lover whispering in my ear. I feel literally drawn to that box as if it had the Hope Diamond in it. I fling my legs off the couch and grab the box, open it and grab not one but TWO granola bars. No thinking, no rationalizing, no nothing…..I rip the wrapper off one of them and cram it in my mouth in three bites. OHMYGOD THIS IS SO AMAZING. I rip the wrapper off the second one and shove it into my pie hole in two bites. I’m chewing and my eyes are almost rolling back in my head as the sugar explodes in my mouth…..Oh My God.
After the…. “incident”….I sit on the couch, satiated yet feeling almost sick with guilt. Realizing then….I am a diabetic. I just consumed SIXTY EIGHT CARBS in one sitting. TWENTY EIGHT GRAMS OF SUGAR. Holy mother of god. What have I done. Are you out of your mind???
I didn’t even bother to check my blood sugar because I knew that it would be outrageously high. I just couldn’t believe it. I had gone on a low carb, low sugar diet when I was diagnosed with diabetes years ago and lost 60 lbs…….I was strict with myself and never allowed more than just a very few grams of sugar and very very very low carbs and the weight just fell off me. I was so amazed and thrilled at the weight loss. Best of all, I had kept it off for several years. I was always so careful and so strict with myself and then I blew it during this five week flare up.
The problem was…..that if I hadn’t been “down” with my pain….this never would have happened. And it happened more than once during these five weeks, I’m sorry to say. Those granola bars became my friend while I’ve been laid up and I have consumed so many of them in the past five weeks that I gained SEVEN POUNDS back. I got on the scale tonight and literally gasped out loud when I saw the numbers. OHMYGOD. What a slap in the face that was.
So…..looks like my friendly granola bars are no longer going to be coming home, Value Size boxes scattered through the house for easy access.
Disabled Diabetic Woman + Quaker Granola Bars = WEIGHT GAIN. Unacceptable. No Way.
It sort of pisses me off when I think about it. Here I have been in severe pain for five weeks, (it is starting to get a little better though, thank god)….and was barely able to get to the kitchen for lunch, even just to grab the sandwich that my husband made me…..so I thought it was okay to just eat the damn granola bars…..I mean I am pretty much out of commission and I can’t even have 4 granola bars??? I have to gain seven pounds on top of everything else!??
The world is a cruel place, my friends. A cruel place.
So anyway…..I guess I will have to figure out something else to have under the coffee table and in various places throughout the house for my next flare up. Cause those granola bars are NOT HAPPENING. **sign of the cross** Seven pounds, no. No No No. Nothing is worth gaining that weight back. I still have a lot to lose but I worked too hard to lose those 60 lbs and especially with having had thyroid disease in my 20’s, it is extremely difficult for me to lose weight without natural metabolism. Now that I am living on synthetic metabolism (thyroid pills, no longer have a thyroid gland), I was extremely lucky to lose any weight at all, let alone a whopping 60 lbs.